This guy tried to get in front of me in line at Starbucks before work one day. He was wearing sunglasses and a hat so I had no idea who he was, not that it would've made a difference pre-caffeine. Me: I think the line you are looking for starts back there.
DQ: Uhh... *walks to the bar, where the barista tells him the same thing*
Me: RANDY QUAID IS BETTER.
Most of that actually happened.
Also his wife looks like a barbie on speed.
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